Country Girls Read online

  Kate It’s beautiful – the sea, the mist, Mr Gentleman telling me things.

  Baba You’re nuts … it can’t be like that for ever.

  Kate It can. We’re meant for one another … and we know it.

  Mrs Gentleman in hat, coat and gloves emerges from the Fortune Teller’s holding a large coloured golf umbrella.

  Baba Jesus, it’s Mrs G.

  Kate What’s she doing here?

  Baba Run … you eejit.

  Mrs Gentleman sees them, makes a dive at them with the umbrella, but Baba gets away.

  Mrs Gentleman Tramps, sluts, streetwalkers. (Pulls Kate by the cardigan.) Caithleen Brady, you are a vixen. I will have you tarred and feathered, beaten and flogged.

  As Kate runs, Mrs Gentleman tries to pull the cardigan from her.

  Mrs Gentleman is shouting wildly as she follows.

  Keep off my grounds, keep off my man, he’s mine mine, you have bamboozled him you tramp, you tinker, you hussy you.

  Mrs Gentleman in her haste trips over her umbrella and the girls flee.

  Mrs Gentleman goes.

  Kate and Baba re-enter boarding-house area, both breathless.

  Joanna Gone to rot the two of you … I tell your fathers. You give house a bad name … my neighbour, she say you dress like streetwalkers, come back at disgrace hours.

  Baba Go to hell.

  Joanna studies Baba’s nicotine fingers.

  Joanna Smoking … drinking. Weeks and weeks no rent, no juice.

  She exits. Baba opens a brown envelope, which has been propped up on the trolley.

  Kate What does it say?

  Baba Well, I’m not preggers … thank Jesus …

  Kate blesses herself repeatedly.

  There’s a spot on my lung … it’s all that fecking milk they gave us in that fecking convent … I have to go to a hospital for tests … down in Tullamore … Bogland.

  Kate I’ll bring you.

  Baba You needn’t … Reg will bring me.

  Kate Are you going steady, Baba?

  Baba As steady as the situation allows.

  Kate What do you see in him?

  Baba He’s rich.

  Kate Is that all?

  Baba (turning away) No, that’s not all.

  Kate How long will you be there?

  Baba Two weeks.

  Kate What treatment will they give you?

  Baba Feck-all – fresh air, walks, scenery, buttermilk, jollop …

  Kate (appeasing) When you come back it’ll be the same.

  Baba It won’t … kiddo.

  Kate Why not?

  Baba You want different things.

  Kate Like what?

  Baba You want poems and stuff … that’s not buzz, that’s not the carousel.

  Kate I know. But we’re best friends.

  Baba We are.

  Kate brushes Baba’s hair. Hold for an instant. Baba turns.

  And don’t you go wearing my finery. Or my fur stole … or the lingerie Reg bought me.

  Baba goes.

  Kate moves to a different part of the stage.

  Mr Gentleman enters, carrying a green orchid, taking Kate by surprise.

  Kate How did you get in?

  Mr Gentleman Through the window.

  Kate Joanna would kill me if she saw you here in the bedroom.

  Mr Gentleman hands her the orchid. It is a greenish orchid with a nozzle in the centre.

  What is it?

  Mr Gentleman An orchid … from my greenhouse.

  He pins it to her cardigan.

  Kate (smelling it) It doesn’t smell.

  Mr Gentleman I have something important to tell you.

  Kate What?

  Mr Gentleman Would you come away with me?

  Kate For ever?

  Mr Gentleman To Vienna. It’s the most beautiful romantic city … I spent three months there as a young man, a night porter in a hotel … I swore … I would go back one day … Rembrandtstrasse, Kärtnerstrasse, Strohkoffer, Mayerling, Josephinum.

  Kate I’ve no nice clothes. We have four, almost five days … No one will know us or look askance, or think he’s too old to be with such a lovely young girl.

  Mr Gentleman (tentative) We could have four, almost five, days, if we get an evening flight home.

  Kate But I want you for always.

  Mr Gentleman Don’t say that.

  Kate I can’t help it.

  Mr Gentleman You see … I have responsibilities.

  Kate I know … I think about it … a lot. I think we shouldn’t see each other ever again.

  Mr Gentleman We have to.

  Kate In a dream … my mother appeared to me and told me it was wrong. Do you want it ended?

  Mr Gentleman (shaking his head) I can’t … You are so young, so trusting, so beautiful –

  Kate (even though she is crying) – and so happy.

  Kate goes to leave and Mr Gentleman draws her back.

  Mr Gentleman Can I whisper you something?

  He whispers and Kate looks at him a bit shocked.

  Kate Here?

  Mr Gentleman Yes … here.

  Kate And if I’m not nice you’ll change your mind, you won’t want me.

  Mr Gentleman I will want you, I will … I’m crazy about you … I’m in love with you, I’m besotted.

  Kate crosses and draws a blind.

  Kate Don’t look.

  Mr Gentleman sits on a stool with his back to her and the audience.

  Kate undresses shyly, stands in only her pants, takes the orchid from her cardigan and holds it to her chest as she gives a few little alerting coughs.

  Mr Gentleman turns, sees her; so smitten is he that he is lost for the right words.

  Mr Gentleman Your skin is whiter than your face … it’s ivory.

  Kate Is that bad?

  Mr Gentleman reaches out for her to come closer to him. They are both with their backs to the audience.

  Mr Gentleman takes off his jacket and then pulls down his trousers and underpants.

  Mr Gentleman We won’t touch, until we are there … far away, alone and together.

  Kate Alone and together.

  They stand facing one another with arms outstretched, fingers not touching.

  Mr Gentleman Nacht und Träume … night and dreams.

  Mr Gentleman pulls up his trousers and runs a comb through his hair as he goes.

  Kate walks to the boarding-house area towards Joanna, who is holding the lilac nightgown.

  Kate I’m going to Vienna.

  Joanna Mein Gott.

  Kate With a friend.

  Joanna A man.

  Kate Yes.

  Joanna The rich man in long stylish coat?

  Kate Him.

  Joanna Vienna … Ah, Vienna. Rembrandtstrasse, Kärtnerstrasse, Strohkoffer, Josephinum, the Winter Garden, Mayerling, Liebe, Liebe, Liebe.

  Kate Will you loan me the nightgown?

  Joanna It’s from my honeymoon … thirty years old.

  Kate I’ll keep it clean.

  Joanna No blood?

  Kate (hurriedly) No blood.

  Joanna holds the nightgown up to Kate.

  Joanna Show Gustav. (Calling.) Gustav.

  Gustav comes, holding a drawer that he has been painting.

  You remember, Gustav … you remember … Rosenhorn, Schreckhorn, Ewigschneehorn, Himmelstrasse, Heaven Street.

  Gustav stares enthralled at Kate and then goes out.

  They’re all the same … men. No soft in them.

  Kate is impervious to that as she dances around imagining Vienna.

  Kate Rembrandtstrasse, Kärtnerstrasse, Strohkoffer, Josephinum, the Winter Garden, Mayerling, Kleine Kleine Kleine. My nerves are good tonight …

  Joanna helps her into a tight-fitted black coat and a white feather hat which curves around one side of her cheek. Joanna kisses her in a welter of sentimentality.

  (Hesitant.) Does it hurt?

  Joanna looks through her thick glasses uncom
prehending; then Kate mimes and runs her hand below her belly.

  Joanna Oh mein Gott, yes … I scream … I cry. Is this love? My nice Gustav become a madman … I try stop him … I say no no no. Afterwards I am happy I am woman … a Frau.

  Kate I won’t be able to sleep with him beside me … His breath … his breathing … I look awful in the morning … blotchy, like a turnip.

  Joanna I give everything to be young again with Gustav.

  Kate walks away in her coat and white feather hat. She is carrying a little travel bag.

  Singing Woman skips along beside her, merrily.

  Singing Woman

  As I went back through Dublin city

  As the sun began to set

  Who should I spy but the Spanish lady

  Catching a moth in a golden net.

  When she saw me thence she fled me

  Lifting her petticoat over her knee

  In all my life I ne’er did see

  A maid so shy as the Spanish lady.

  It is raining.

  Kate stands under the awning of a public house with a couple of fairy lights.

  Young Boy comes from inside the arcade, aiming a snooker cue.

  Young Boy

  Got the right time?

  Got a fag?

  Got a light?

  Got a rocket?

  Going to a funeral, are you?

  She turns away and walks up and down.

  Dolly, a woman with peroxide hair, comes from the pub.

  Dolly Why don’t you stand inside?

  Kate No. My friend will be here any minute.

  Dolly Shocking night … shocking altogether. Don’t pay any heed to them gurriers … they hang around here hoping to click girls.

  Dolly goes.

  Kate walks to wings and bumps into Baba hurrying in, holding a telegram.

  Kate reads it, then squelches it.

  Kate He’ll still come.

  Baba He won’t come. That’s what men do when they can’t come.

  Kate He loves me … he’s besotted.

  Baba Love’s got nothing to do with it.

  Kate Love’s got everything to do with it.

  Baba You want a bet … Head or harp?

  Kate Harp.

  Baba flings a coin in the air and waits for it to come down.

  Baba Harp, shit. Reg has a new fella for you … He’s a dentist … He’s from the north, you won’t onderstand a word he’s saying … (Belfast accent.) ‘Do ya dig with yer right foot, Caith-leen.’ (Normal voice.) Come on … the rebound.

  Kate I’m not going. I’m staying here.

  Baba For what?

  Kate Gabriel will change his mind … he’ll get into his car and he’ll drive like mad in the rain.

  Baba Dope.

  Baba goes.

  Kate takes off her wet hat and starts to wring it as if it were a chicken.

  A fog descends. Foghorns offstage and yelling of hooligans.

  Kate walks back and forth, nervous.

  A young Dublin Hobo cycles on very fast.

  Hobo Hey, gorgeous.

  Kate ignores him.

  Thirty-two degrees is freezing point, what’s squeezing point?

  Kate lowers her face into her coat collar.

  Have a heart.

  Kate Scram.

  Hobo Strumpet.

  He cycles off recklessly.

  Dolly comes from shop. She hands Kate a bottle of advocaat.

  Dolly Warm you up.

  Kate drinks.

  Hobo returns.

  Buskers stumble out of the door.

  Busker Did you get a Frenchie?

  Hobo Bollocks.

  Busker Take her up to Monto.

  Hobo Fuckin’ frigid, turnip-snaggin’ culchies. (Starting the beat of the song.) Two … three … four.

  They roughly sing ‘Monto’, pounding and stamping out the rhythms. They toss things back and forth, do various stunts all the while. Dolly joins too.

  Busker

  Did ya hear of Buckshot Forster, the dirty ould imposthor

  Got a mot and lost her in the Furry Glen

  So he just put on his bowler, and he buttoned up his trowser

  Then he whistled for a growler, and he said: ‘My man.’

  So –

  Dolly

  And take her up to Monto, Monto, Monto

  Take her up to Monto, lan-ge-roo,

  To you!

  Hobo

  You’ve seen the Dublin Fusiliers,

  The dirty old bamboozlers,

  They went and get the children, one, two, three.

  Marching from the Linen Hall

  There’s one for every cannonball,

  And Vicky’s going to send youse all, o’er the sea.

  Busker

  But first go up to Monto, Monto, Monto

  First go up to Monto, lan-ge-roo,

  To you!

  Hobo

  Oh … when the Czar of Rooshia and the King of Prooshia

  Landed in the Phaynix in a big ball–oo–an,

  They asked the polis band to play The Wearing of the Green,

  But the buggers in the Dee-pot didn’t know the tyoo-an

  So –

  Dolly

  And take her up to Monto, Monto, Monto

  Take her up to Monto, lan-ge-roo,

  To you!

  Busker

  Queen Vic she came to call on us, she wanted to meet all of us

  ’Tis well she didn’t fall on us, she’s eighteen sto-an!

  Then, ‘Mister, my Lord Mayor,’ says she,

  ‘Is that all yez have to show to me?’

  ‘Why, no Ma’am, there’s some more,’ says he,

  ‘Pogue-ma-hone!’

  So –

  All

  And he took her up to Monto, Monto, Monto

  Took her up to Monto, lan-ge-roo,

  To you!

  They cycle off in high spirits. Sounds offstage of foghorns, drunks shouting and an ambulance siren.

  Thicker fog. Fairy lights on arcade awning go out.

  Kate is dazed and a little drunk. She does a whirling dervish dance to sober up but instead drops down on to the stage and falls asleep.

  White mist rises over the stage and silence, save for offstage, coming distantly, the sound of a new-born baby.

  Tall Man in green trousers and corduroy jacket with soft brown hat enters. He sees Kate on the floor, stands above her, gazes, then lifts his hat in a gesture of courtesy.

  Kate wakens, blurred.

  Kate I dhrank the … wathers … (She can’t finish the sentence.)

  Tall Man (soft spoken, slightly Northern accent) You drank the what, darlin’?

  Kate The waters of Lethe.

  Tall Man The waters of forgetfulness. Who you trying to forget?

  Kate Everyone.

  Tall Man Great … supergreat. The waters of forgetfulness. Forget the shits.

  He helps her up.

  On the town were you, mavourneen?

  Kate Yeah. On the town.

  Tall Man Nothing like it. Nothing like being on the town … Fuck the shits.

  Kate Fuck the shits.

  Tall Man Did anyone ever tell you you have the most beautiful eyes – blue-green-grey-aquamarine eyes.

  Kate (spluttering with laughter) Don’t know … I dhrunk the waters of forgetfulness.

  Tall Man You’re a lady.

  Kate Ah now.

  Tall Man With the most beautiful aquamarine eyes and the neckline of a white swan.

  Kate Easy. Easy.

  Tall Man No offence. What’s your name?

  Kate Caithleen.

  Tall Man Finn, Finbar.

  Kate What do you work at, Finn?

  Tall Man Poet.

  Kate Poet!

  Tall Man And forester.

  Kate Are you drinking the waters of forgetfulness, Finn?

  Tall Man I am. Those touched by the bard need it, the aqua vitae, the water of life.

  Kate
What kind of poetry?

  Tall Man Gerard Manley Hopkins, he’s my man.

  Kate He’s mine too.

  Tall Man Extraordinaire. We’re soul mates, Caithleen. We’re Gerard Manley Hopkins soul mates. Let me tell you something. This is providence. This is unique. You can count the Gerard Manley Hopkins aficionados on one hand, one hand, Caithleen. (He shakes her hand.) Where do you live?

  Kate Where do you live?

  Tall Man I’ve a wee place beyond Donabate.

  Kate Beyond Donabate.

  Tall Man ‘Towards Meath of the pastures … wet hills by the sea.’ I’ll put you up … let the waters of Lethe subside in you.

  Kate I’m not sure.

  Tall Man (reciting)

  ‘Come with me, under my coat,

  And we will drink our fill

  Of the milk of the white goat,

  Or wine if it be thy will.’

  Kate That’s James Stephens.

  Tall Man That’s the crock of gold James Stephens.

  He offers his arm for her to link. She hesitates.

  ‘Stay with me, under my coat,

  And we will drink our fill

  Of the milk of the white goat,

  Or wine if it be thy will.’

  Gently he takes her arm and as they walk he sings, with bravura, a martial-sounding song (‘Captain of the Whiskers’).

  They go.

  Dawn. Wasteland.

  A keen wind and torn newspapers blowing about.

  Sound of a running stream offstage.

  Kate is huddled on a stump, gabbling to herself – the words unintelligible as yet.

  As lights come up, we see that it is a wasteland, strewn with rubbish, wet newspapers, broken bottles, torn garments, ribs of an old umbrella etc. Kate is barefoot, her lap and legs covered with newspaper.

  Sound of an owl, repeating.

  Kate talks back to it, voice jagged.

  Kate

  Tit-willow … tit-willow … tit-woo …

  Gives a little, odd laugh.

  ‘And dupped the chamber door.’

  She picks up a newspaper that has blown at her feet and reads.

  (Reading.) ‘Rangers may have to reduce the deer-hunt to improve ratio of bucks to does.’ (Strange laugh. Reads elsewhere.) ‘Tempest overturns truck.’ (Reciting.) ‘O western wind, when wilt thou blow … The small rain down doth rain … Christ, that my love were in my arms and I in my bed again.’

  She throws the newspaper away, then looks inside the newspapers covering her body, horrified covers herself.

  Rain couldn’t get down the window fast enough … A dump … Torn linoleum … Dear Guest … In the event of fire … do not take the elevator. (Strange laugh.) Poet and forester … Hopes to teach at the Sorbonne … Ergo, a swell … ‘And dupped the chamber door …’ (Looks again inside the newspaper, makes a face, then blesses herself.) Lamb of God, who taketh away the sins of the world, have mercy on us.